What Was I Thinking?

Another year...

2011-04-20T08:41:00.000-07:00

So I was just checking up on my blog when I noticed a comment from my mother. "Ahem," she says!! I guess I should take that as a hint that I should post something soon :) I get the picture mom!! :)

Happy Birthday Momma!!! I lugs you!!! (inside joke...not misspelled)

It's been a busy year to say the least. Olivia decided in the fall that she wanted to play soccer, take a dance class, and a cheerleading class. So I dug my soccer mom shoes (from a few years ago)out of the closet and said "Sure...why not?" I spent September, October, and November shuffling her from soccer to dance/cheer classes 3 times a week. It's been completely worth it because about that time, my parents had bought me a Sony eReader (just because). It's a wonderful invention!!! Anyone that knows me knows how much I LOVE to read. I take that thing EVERYWHERE I go. All of those practices gave me ample time to read book after book.

I got a little vacation in December. You can't really call it that when you're running around getting all of your to do list for the holiday completed. We had a TON of snow this season!! I couldn't believe it. It even snowed on Christmas eve and it wasn't just a little snow. We're talking it was at least 4 inches of snow. For those of you Northerners, I know that's not a lot of snow but for us in Kentucky, 4 inches equals a snowpocalypse!!! The whole city shuts down.

Now in early December the kids (and the hubby) wore me down and finally talked me into getting a puppy. Of course we had to do it on my terms though because I would eventually be the person who had to take care of it. A good friend told us that a Havanese dog would suit me well. That particular breed managed to fit every stinkin criteria I had for what kind of dog I would tolerate. December 7th Joey and I found a breeder in Alvaton and went and got little Bella. I think most of her 1.5 pound weight was just in her fur :) She was a tiny thing and so sweet. We surprised the kids with her when they got home from school. They were thrilled!!

She has become a huge part of our family!! I have just fallen head over heels in love with her!! I think God led us to this breeder. Bella just fits right in with us and the cats. She was awfully hilarious in the snow. She kept disappearing and reappearing in the drifts :) Note to self: never get a dog in the winter!!

As I mentioned we had a lot of snow this season. The kids were constantly out of school and as a result will be in school until June 3rd this year. Gavin will be in junior high in the fall and Olivia will be in 5th grade. Both of them will be leaving Alvaton Elementary this year. It's a big step for both of them but one I am confident they can handle.

December, January, and February we rough months because my grandmother pretty much stayed in the hospital. Momma had to travel a lot to stay with her at the hospital. I can't imagine how hard it was to be away from home so much. On February 26th, Granny passed away after a long fight with Pulmonary Fibrosis. She was a trooper and I am very glad I got to spend some time with her. We all miss her terribly though. I am grateful that I have such wonderful friends to get me thru times like these.

In March Olivia decided that she wanted to play soccer again and continue with her cheerleading class. The dance class was just too full of "little kids" for her. So I'm back to burning up the roads of Bowling Green to get her from point A to point B. It's worth it to watch her having fun.

Mr. Gavin has taken up playing the saxophone. He began in September at school and I believe he is a natural. He was playing simple songs within 5 minutes of putting the instrument together. After that I didn't get to hear him play again until March. I was so impressed when he played me one of the songs that he would be performing at the band concert later that month. He is so good at it but he gets a bit frustrated when he makes a mistake. That's typical Gavin though.

It's hard to believe that they have only 6 more weeks of school!!

Well...that's the last 9 months in a nutshell. I will do my best to try to post more often. Hope you have a blessed day!!!!

What's up??

2010-07-07T12:55:00.000-07:00

I know it's been over 3 months since I last posted but you gotta cut me some slack. I've been a busy girl!!

We got the house under contract in March and I had to start packing. It seemed like every time I put something in a box, something else would pop up in its place. Either that or someone would start asking where such and such was (even though they hadn't touched it in YEARS)!! :) Oh well... I guess that's the way it goes.

In May Renee came out for a visit. We had a lot of fun!! Olivia flew back to Arizona with her for a weeks vacation. She had a blast. Its the first time she has been away from home for that long. I don't think she wanted to come back home.

Gavin went to Louisville the same week to visit Sarah, Aaron, and the twins. Sarah said he wasn't too thrilled about the twins crying. He had a lot of fun though.

Where was I during all this free time?? :) I was in the Bahamas with my hubby :) Woo Hoo!!! We went with several other couples from his office (a company trip).

We had a great time. We stayed at the Atlantis Resort on Paradise Island. Our room and view were gorgeous. We ate and ate and downed a few Bahama Mamas as well. We went down to the beach at night and sat and stared at the stars. It was so peaceful listening to the ocean.

We went shopping downtown, sailed around the island on a catamaran, stared at the ENORMOUS cruise ships in the harbor, gambled a little, floated around the lazy river, and found the shadiest spot in one of the many pools. Leave it to Casper to search out the shade in paradise. :) I had a wonderful massage at the spa one day. Joey played golf with some of the guys at the country club. We even went to a theater at the resort and saw Avatar on the big screen (free for guests).

My most memorable moment was parasailing. We tried it in the Dominican Republic and I LOVED it so of course I had to do it again!! Joey put on a brave face and went with me again. It is so beautiful being hundreds of feet up in the air and being able to see for miles. After that, we went jet skiing for a little bit.

Of course, all good things must come to an end and Joey had to drag me kicking and screaming back home :( Oh well.

Once we were home, I had to finish packing the house because the move was only a week away.

I had the pleasure to babysit the twins for Sarah and Aaron's anniversary. Olivia went with me to help. I couldn't have done it without her!! My hat is off to Sarah for handling both of them on a daily basis. They were perfect angels and we had such a good time with them. Can't wait to do it again!!

Needless to say...the move didn't go a smoothly as I had planned, but that's a long, long story! The bottom line is that we are now happily in our cozy new home!! It's a little dollhouse. The kids love it and the neighborhood is really nice. We are so thankful everything worked out.

We had a wonderful Father's day and Fourth of July with our friends and family. Of course it was bittersweet but you make the best of the situation. Missy would be proud!!

So that's the last 3 months in a nutshell...now it's time to kick back and relax. LOL...yeah right!!!

I'm trying to keep my promise...

2010-03-25T14:04:00.000-07:00

Today is one of those days I wish I was at home in my PJ's, wrapped up in my snuggie, on the couch, and watching a flick! It is cloudy, windy and rainy. Yuck!

As the title says, I am trying to keep my promise to blog more frequently. A VERY big thing has happened since I last posted. We got our house under contract!!!! Yippee!!! I am so excited. The fun game of trying to pick a new house has begun. We have until June 14th to close and move out. this gives us plenty of time to find "the right one." In the few weeks that we have been looking we have struck out more times than I can count. We put an offer in on one property that we really liked in Hidden River only to find out the next day that someone had beaten us to the punch the day before.

Oh well...I know that's just God's way of saying "not yet guys...just be patient...take your time." The only bad thing about taking my time is that I don't know how to take my time. My life for the last 11 years has been about rushing to get from point A to point B. I do EVERYTHING fast. It's almost like I have this constant timer inside me. I know God has a plan for us, and that's why I am learning to listen for him. He speaks in a whisper to me, so I have to pay very close attention to what is happening around me.

One of our problems is that we have limited ourselves to looking at houses in one particular area of Bowling Green. There are several homes that we have to look at so we are staying positive. The other problem is that people seem to be flocking to buy homes because the tax credit runs out at the end of April. Houses seem to be going under contract left and right. It's crazy around here. We will be fine. The worst case scenario is that we have to buy a lot and move into an apartment while we build a house that we like.

The whole house hunting experience has been hilarious so far. We went to several open houses one Sunday afternoon with the kids. They were bouncing off the walls and I was trying to keep them reigned in to the best of my ability. They were so excited to be looking with us that I can't blame them, but my nerves were wearing thin. We went into one particular home where the realtor had SEVERAL candles burning. This would have been fine had they not been all very different and very potent smells. You had to breathe through your mouth to keep from passing out. Well...Gavin, being the fun little man that he is, yells out, "What's that smell? It stinks in here!" I could have died!!! The realtor was in the next room and both Joey and myself are practically sitting on him to keep him quiet. He just kept saying it until we finally had to tell him that he could go stand outside on the porch. Poor little guy just doesn't have that whole brain/mouth filter worked out yet. Olivia was a champ. She only whispered to us once about the smell an held her breath the rest of the time. Note to Realtors: Only one candle should be lit at a time!! People tend to lose brain functioning when they can't breathe!!

Of course at the time I was super embarrassed. As soon as we all got back into the car (after several deep breaths) we cracked up about the whole thing. Kids are great for comic relief.

Our realtor rocks!! We have the best time looking at property with him. Of course, it helps that I used to be his assistant. He reminds me of one of my uncles. He and Charlie are constantly making cracks about something. that is what is making this whole experience bearable. I feel very in between right now. I want to pack, but I don't want to do it too early or before we know what house we are getting. I know the people who are buying our house are supposed to be solid, so I'm not worried about that. I just like to know where I'm going before I pack for it (kind of like a trip).

So that's where we are right now. We've spent most of our weekends driving up and down and all around Three Springs Rd. It keeps us busy. I'll try to keep you posted on things .

On a side note...my latest why not moment involved me dragging my friend Karen out at midnight last Friday to purchase a copy of New Moon on DVD. What makes it even more funny is that I had pre-ordered a copy from Wal-mart but I wasn't going to receive it in the mail until this week. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Don't worry...I had the stun gun and a feisty Italian with me :) Plus, we were home by 12:30 a.m. thanks to the short lines at Best Buy. Why you ask would I go out at midnight to pick up a movie that I had already ordered? Why not?? :) It was something different to do. See how much fun you can have when you do something out of the ordinary?

Why not??

2010-02-09T13:01:00.000-08:00

So I'm sitting here thinking about how much of a slacker I've been in regards to posting on my blog. When I first started this blog, I was pretty good about keeping up with it. I'm not sure what went wrong along the way but I promise to be better this year!!

I'm sure a lot has occured in the 5 months since I last posted, but I honestly can't remember very much. I know that we celebrated Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's in the usual way...surrounded by family and friends. I wouldn't change it for the world. I will chalk my lack of memory up to being excessively busy.

Anywho...back to the present.

Gavin and Olivia are growing up so quickly. Olivia got a phone in her room for Christmas. I haven't had to answer the phone since we hooked it up. I know it's a girl thing! She's so funny about it all. She has called her Aunt Renee' just about every day. I finally had to tell her that she has to ask me or Joey if she can call anyone. Then we introduced her (along with Janice, Chuck and Rick) to Skype. I will admit it's an awesome concept. A free video phone program. We can call anyone and talk as long as we want for free. The video quality isn't stellar and the program has some glitches, but to be able to see the Arizona gang while we talk to them is worth it all!!! She is starting to remind me of a teenager with the way she talks and wants to dress. I don't know if I am ready for all of that. We went shopping on Martin Luther King day and I just kept thinking about what it will be like in a few years with her. It kind of freaked me out!! I barely have the patience for all the drama now!! Oy vey!!

Gavin is doing well. He is still very much into his video games. He amazes me by how smart he is. This year he made it into the Gifted and Talented program at school. I was so proud of him (and still am). We like to pick on each other sometimes. I was teasing him the other day about how he runs like a monkey. It was a Friday afternoon, and I was picking the kids up from school. As most of you know, he is only allowed to play video games on the weekend and during school breaks. Well, he came flying up to the car rider line with his hands waving over his head. It was HILARIOUS!! He looked like the monkey in the Clint Eastwood movies. He even makes noises like a monkey. I've always called him my monkey boy. When he was little, he used to hold his bottle with his feet so he could drink it. That's where it began, but him running around just brought it all back. I couldn't help but pick on him about it. Of course he was in the back seat pretending he was embarassed and Olivia had to throw in her two cents. I love those moments as long as they don't turn into a sibling smack down in the backseat that is!

What can I say about Joey? He is the same as he always is. You gotta love his consistency. Although he has discovered Facebook (Mafia Wars) and Ebay. All I have to say about that is..."bad things man...bad things."

Now about what I was really wanting to say.

I decided this year to not make New Year's resolutions. Let's face it, by now most of them would have been broken and you would be feeling like a failure. Who needs that kind of blow to their self esteem? Instead, I decided to approach the year in a different way. I decided to have a why not kind of year. I am always afraid to do things because I constantly worry about something. I worry about what others will think. I worry about all the other things I should be doing at that very moment. You get the idea.

I decided that when life is asking you why you should learn to respond with why not? I'm not encouraging reckless behavior or anything like that. I am stopping to ask myself is that worry or chore really worth it? Should I really care what others think? Is the laundry that important? When I think of things in that way, I realize that none of it matters. What good is being alive when you're not enjoying all that life has to offer? Are you really living?

One of my favorite quotes is "Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting, 'WOW . . . What a ride!' " It's been a while since I have lived this way. I think the last time I said why not was back in 2007 when Missy and I dropped everything and drove to Florida on a whim. It was such a surreal experience. I kept thinking to myself on the drive down "did we really just do that?" I had a blast on that trip. Mom has referred to it as our Thelma and Louise moment. That's how we wound up with tattoos. We just decided why not?

You are ONLY as old as you let yourself feel!! I personally want to feel like a 21 year old again. I have let myself fall into the rut of being a wife and mother only. I have forgotten that I am much more than just that. That is why I thought of this idea. So far it has been paying off. I have rediscovered my real laugh and my fun side. Instead of feeling like a 50 year old when I wake up I think I am down to a 40 year old. That 21 year old is just around the corner :)

I encourage everyone to ask themselves why not when faced with a decision. Sometimes you just have to go for it. Remember, you don't have to be reckless and abandon your life. Just try to have a little more fun and try new things. Don't let yourself get stuck in a rut.

Remember this, "Life is not measured by the number of breaths that we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." I love that quote!!

I can't stop thinking about this song...

2009-08-19T07:54:00.000-07:00

Breathe
by Taylor Swift and Colbie Caillat

I see your face in my mind as I drive away,Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way.People are people,And sometimes we change our minds.But it’s killing me to see you go after all this time.

Mmm mmm mmmMmm mmm mmm mmm mmmMmm mmm mmmMmm mmm mmm mmm mmm

Music starts playin’ like the end of a sad movie,It’s the kinda ending you don’t really wanna see.Cause it’s tragedy and it’ll only bring you down,Now I don’t know what to be without you around.

And we know it’s never simple,Never easy.Never a clean break, no one here to save me.You’re the only thing I know like the back of my hand,And I can’t,Breathe,Without you,But I have to,Breathe,Without you,But I have to.

Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt.Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve.But people are people,And sometimes it doesn’t work out,Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out.

And we know it’s never simple,Never easy.Never a clean break, no one here to save me.You’re the only thing I know like the back of my hand,And I can’t,Breathe,Without you,But I have to,Breathe,Without you,But I have to.

It’s two a.m.Feelin' like I just lost a friend.Hope you know it’s not easy,Easy for me.
It’s two a.m.Feelin’ like I just lost a friend.Hope you know this ain’t easy,Easy for me.

And we know it’s never simple,Never easy.Never a clean break, no one here to save me.Ohhh
I can’t,Breathe,Without you,But I have to,Breathe,Without you,But I have to.

Sorry (oh) Sorry (mmm)Sorry (eh eh) Sorry (mmm)Sorry (eh eh) Sorry (mmm)Sorry

© SONY/ATV SONGS D/B/A TREE PUBG CO; TAYLOR SWIFT PUB DESIGNEE

You would have to hear this song to understand how beautiful is. Olivia bought Taylor Swift's most recent CD on Saturday. She asked if we could play the CD on the way home. I halfway listened to the songs as I was driving until this one came on. The song finished and I was overwhelmed. I had to play it again. I probably listened to this song 20 times that night.

I know it's supposed to be a break-up song, but for some reason I kept thinking about Missy. It's like the song says..."I can't breathe without you but I have to." When I first realized that she was dead it was like the air had been sucked out of me. I couldn't breathe. Each day since the accident I have been teaching myself to breathe again. I never had time to shut down, and honestly...I never wanted to shut down. My instinct was to keep pushing myself each day to get up, get the kids ready for school, get myself ready for school and whatever else the day had to offer me. I know without a doubt that what I was doing was exactly what Missy would want and expect me to do.

Now don't get me wrong...I allowed myself time to grieve when I needed to. I just grieved more internally. I wasn't hiding it. I just was handling it all in my own stride. Today, I am better. The "oxygen tank" has been removed and I am breathing on my own... If hope you get a chance to listen to this song.

She's baaacccckkkk!!

2009-05-18T17:27:00.000-07:00

Did you miss me?

I must first apologize for my long absence. I have just been very busy (and maybe a wee bit selfish) the last couple of months.

Well, three months at work and going strong! I really enjoy my job. I don't wake up dreading the day ahead and I don't stare at the clock wondering why 4:30 p.m. cannot come earlier in the day. It has a few drawbacks, but I refuse to even go there because anyone that knows me already knows what I will say. I am beginning to develop some nice friendships there. It will take me a long while to feel comfortable. I would say my comfort level is somewhere between laying on a bed of nails and that itch you get on the bottom of your right foot while driving in a pair of laced up boots! You all know what I am talking about.

I really need to decorate my office it's kind of dreary, aside from the Marilyn Monroe picture that I received from my mom and Janice. The guys like it a lot! I just have to figure out what I want on the other 3 walls.

I pretty much understand what my job is all about now and that is a huge relief. I hate feeling ignorant. I still have a lot of "blond moments," but everyone seems to ignore them.

The next exciting this is that my "little sis" is knocked up!!!! I'm going to be an auntie to twins!! I am so excited and I can't wait to spoil them rotten. Hopefully we will find out what they are by the end of the month so the spoiling can begin. Sarah looks beautiful and I am always happy to rub the belly!!! She and Aaron are going to be phenomenal parents. Sarah's had a lot of practice with my munchkins.

Speaking of my munchkins...

Gavin and Livvy were baptized on Sunday at church. I have been excited for this day for some time. I wasn't prepared for the emotions that I felt. I watched them walk into the baptistry and tears immediately filled my eyes. There wasn't a Kleenex in sight. I wasn't the only one that was misty eyed!! It was so moving to watch my kids one at a time go under the water and resurface as a testimony to their faith. My only hope is that in this world, they never lose that faith. Sometimes it is the only thing we have to hold on to.

I will admit for the last month I have been very selfish. I spent every free moment I had reading. I truly enjoy reading. It is a hobby I don't get to indulge in too much. I started reading the Twilight series and was so captivated by the story that I read the whole series in a month. It seemed like everyone I knew had read it and I was out of the loop (thanks Dana and Sarah!!). It was one of those stories that begs you to keep reading and you just can't pull yourself away. I read until my eyes blurred sometimes and loved every minute of it. I am thankful that I read it because it awakened something in me that I thought had vanished years ago. It made me want to write again. I haven't written anything since my kids were born. It's not that I haven't wanted to, but I just honestly couldn't find the time. I never claimed to be a good writer, but I just enjoyed the art of writing. There is something about pouring your heart out on paper that makes you feel so many different emotions. I haven't written anything yet, but it made me want to write. It's like a craving now. I just need a story to tell. That's the hard part, finding something to write about. I live a fairly uneventful life, which makes it hard to draw from personal experience. I also lack the creativity to just think up some story that is worth telling.

I love to read Nicholas Sparks books. He is a great story teller. He is so good about pulling emotions out of his readers. His books always make me cry. Stephenie Meyer wrote Twilight based on a dream she had one night. I am not blessed with that kind of creativity. I guess I write better with prompts. I had a great English teacher in college. She had this ability to pull the creativity out of me. It was your typical English composition class, but she focused on creative writing rather than writing about books we read. I loved that class so much. I need to do some research on the Internet to find some writing prompts that appeal to me. I don't want to write a novel or anything like that. I just want to simply "get it out of my system." Don't get me wrong, it would be nice to be the next J.K. Rowlings or Stephenie Meyer, but that is not my goal. It would be so gratifying to write something that people couldn't stop reading. It's not even a money thing. It is just the desire to write something that special.

So there you have it folks. That's been the last two months for me in a nutshell. Of course, more than what I have written about has been going on, but then what would I have to write about next time?

3 weeks down...27 years to go!!

2009-03-08T15:38:00.001-07:00

I know it's been a while since I last posted. I started work on February 16th and it has been non- stop action ever since.

I am really enjoying my job. The schedule is perfect for me and the family. The people I work with are all very nice and easy to get along with. The boss is pretty easy going and the job itself is not that stressful. You wouldn't have read that last sentence if I had written this entry 2 weeks ago. My first week on the job was pretty typical of what everyone experiences. I absorbed so much new information that by the end of the week that I was having some serious brain farts. I was lucky if I could tell you my name by Friday.

The whole week I felt out of place, nervous, and BLONDE!!! I would ask a question and instantly regret it because I already knew the answer (see...brain farts!). I kept thinking, "I'm a liar!! I told these people during the interview that I was awesome and that they would not regret hiring me. Now they're probably thinking where is the lady we interviewed two weeks ago." I know that the way I was feeling is completely normal, but you just can't help but feeling like you are letting your employer down.

Things improved the second week, and now that I have just finished my third week I feel more comfortable. I actually hung up a couple of pictures in my office because I figured if they were going to fire me then they would have done it already. They were all kind of glad when I finally started decorating my office. I kept hearing the phrase, "It's about time you covered up these white walls."

I work for three of the counselors and they are the best. Each person in the office has made me feel like a part of the team. I think I can definitely stick around for a while!! Heck...I have 27 years until I can retire :)

On the other hand, we have put our house on the market. I am thrilled to no end. I love my home and I love my neighbors so it is very bittersweet. Charlie and I just want to be closer to town and in a smaller house. With both of us working and not getting home until 6 p.m. or later it doesn't make sense to keep something this big. I can't keep it picked up, and we want to spend more time together. I miss my family!

So not only do I have to get up and get ready for work and get the kids ready for school, but I also have to make sure the house is ready if someone wants to see it. My mornings are VERY crazy. We have been looking at several houses and have found 2 that we are absolutely in love with. Gavin is not thrilled about the move. The little aspie in him is not happy about the change in his routine. He doesn't want to leave his friends or his school. I understand it's a very big deal for him. Olivia is following my advice and treating this like it's an adventure. Gavin said that if we move then he will not go with us and he will just stay in the house after we are gone. I don't believe that was part of the real estate ad and if it was, then we need to ask more for the house :)

Picture this...

"Beautiful 4BR 3BA home on a one acre lot. All appliances and one child included."

That would definitely catch some attention don't you think?

Gavin did go look at the homes we like today which is a big step for him. He liked them and quickly told Olivia which room was his! We are trying to get him as pumped as possible without pushing him over the edge. He will be fine. I hate that they have to leave their friends because I know how hard that is on a kid. I also know that if we constantly bowed to their every whim then we would be making a great mistake as a parent. I feel that they will both learn something very valuable from this move. It will be a life lesson that will teach them about handling change and that life doesn't always work out the way you want it to.

I hope you all have a great rest of the day!!

She shoots...she SCORES!!!

2009-02-10T06:14:00.000-08:00

"Mrs. Provance?"

"Yes."

"We have narrowed our choice down to you and one other person. We would like for you to come in for a second interview. It will be the five of us plus two additional committee members."
"Sure, I would love to."

Well, they asked me to come back and do it all over again. That's right me versus seven hungry staring people. It was at this point that I realized that it might be a good idea to start breathing again so I wouldn't pass out. The panic mode kicked in as usual and I had numerous conversations with the doubter in me. Why did they have to tell me it was down to me and one other person. The pressure was on now. Time for D-day!

The actual interview was on the day after the huge ice storm that hit Kentucky. Luckily our area was spared. The kids were out of school because not only did we get ice the day before, but we got snow the next day. The interview was not until 1p.m. so I had plenty of time to get ready. Joey came home from work early to drive me to the interview. The roads were too iffy for me to drive and he is kind of protective like that. We all piles into the 4-wheel drive truck and were off. I arrived at the interview a half hour early and had to wait for the other candidate to finish. All was well until I heard laughter in the hallway. That's when the voices in my head pounced. They told me all kinds of things I did not need to hear. "It must be going really well for them to be laughing so loud, they said." "You don't stand a chance. You're under-qualified and you don't have the experience." Nag...nag...nag! Finally it's my turn.

I entered the room and they were all smiling. Someone made a comment and they all laughed. I said, "You all had so much fun making the pale, sweaty girl squirm last time that you just had to do it all again huh?" Bingo! They all laughed hard at that one. The questions began, and even though I stuttered my way through some of them I felt like I had done fairly well. I was able to maintain my composure and I even made some more jokes. I wasn't going overboard with the jokes. I just threw out some witty comment every no and then. It was helping me relax. At the end of their questioning, they asked me if I had any questions. I said, "What no role-playing today? I had so much fun the first time." Once again they laughed hard at my joke. My job would involve being a secretary for three counselors (all three were in the interview with me). I asked each counselor what they expected from their employee. It was the only real question I could think of. The interview was finally over. They gave me a quick tour of the building. Once that was over, I hopped into the truck, where Joey and the kids had been waiting patiently for over an hour, and we started driving home. A few minutes after I left the interview I was on the phone with my brother-in-law, when it beeped to let me know I had another call. I switched over and it was one of my interviewers calling to let me know I had the job.

I was so stunned (and in a bad cell phone spot) that I wasn't sure I had heard him correctly. I believe I said something like "oh wow...really?" That was just the professional answer I was looking for (notice that comment is heavy with sarcasm). I was caught off guard so I asked him if I could let him know my answer in the morning. (I had recently had an interview at another company that went well and I wasn't sure if I would be offered both jobs. I just needed to weigh my options). He said that would be fine but to let him know first thing in the morning. I hung up the phone with the interviewer and then with my brother-in-law. Joey and I talked about it for a minutes and he basically told me I was crazy if I didn't take this job. The other job wouldn't have benefits and it would start out as full-time then move to part-time in May. It was at a small CPA office and I was very much into the idea of a job in the field I had actually studied in school. We both decided that the job with the state was the best opportunity and that I couldn't pass it up. I immediately called them back and accepted the position.

Talk about "shooting the big one!"

So, as of February 16 I will be gainfully employed in the real world. I celebrated by leaving town for a week to visit my sister-in-law in Arizona.

I left the cold and snow to fly to much warmer temperatures. It was so beautiful. It was 75 degrees and sunny every day I was there. I had a tremendous time as always. Renee and her family are always a blast to be around. You can't help but have a good time when you're with them. They are always so happy and laughing. It could be because of the four crazy dogs they have. It is a know fact that I am not a dog person. The misconception is that I hate dogs. I don't hate dogs...I just prefer cats. Large dogs make me nervous (except Dana's rottie Thorn). Renee has two full sized dobermans and two miniature dobermans. They are a blast. One of the big ones knows how to open doors so you have to make sure you lock them especially if you are in the bathroom. They all follow her everywhere. We couldn't go outside with out Zena opening the door to let the whole crew out. Shelby (one of the min pins) is my favorite. She is old and grumpy but loves to cuddle. She doesn't lick either which is a big bonus for me! One night Renee, Niki and I were sitting outside talking and Shelby was in my lap. All was well until the two big dobermans started to play. Any time they came near Shelby and me, Shelby would freak out and start growling and barking. Renee said that was her way of protecting me. I wasn't in any danger of course but Shelby was protecting her spot on my lap.

I also got to hang out with one of Renee's friends who I absolutely adore. She is a lot of fun to be around! Thanks Tilty!! We have such a great time when we all get together. Renee and I had such a good time window shopping and riding around. She was going to teach me how to ride a dirt bike but we ran out of time. Oh well, there's always next time!

Is it hot in here or is it just me?

2009-01-22T14:02:00.000-08:00

With my Associates Degree in hand, I have ventured out into the world of job hunting. It's a frightening experience that feeds on patience and frustration. I exited my educational realm with enthusiasm and a smile on my face eager for my first kill.

Hunting is a sport I have a somewhat knowledgeable grasp on. My husband is a seasonal hunter. If it's a season, then he is hunting! Job searching is not that different from hunting.

You gather up your supplies and watch a million shows on bagging "THE BIG ONE" to educate yourself. This is a lot like the process of going to school and getting your degree. (I would have to say that hunting "the big one" is cheaper!) The next step is to put together a resume and send it to every single classified ad in the paper, on the internet, and posted on any bulletin board that you see. I believe in casting a big net :) This process is a lot like a hunter baiting his prey. You buy a lot of corn feeders and scents like doe pee to attract your game. Deer really do love this stuff or at least that's what my husband says right after he says "here...smell this." Then, you sit back and wait for the phone calls to come rolling in.

Months down the road, when you have just about given up, you finally get that phone call. "Mrs. Provance, we have reviewed you resume and we would like for you to come in for an interview." Oh the rapturous joy you feel at that very moment. You call everyone you know and tell them about it. Then the reality sets in and the adrenaline wears off leaving you in shock and panic! "They want me to what?" That's right...they want to talk to me and ask me questions and stare at me intensely. That is when your brain kicks in to remind you to breathe because you're about to pass out!

So, two agonizing and panic filled weeks go by and it's D-day! The big interview has arrived! You wake up tired because you couldn't sleep. Your stomach is all in knots, and all you want to do is crawl under the covers and go back to bed. You have done your research but you still do not feel like you are ready for what lies ahead. My husband is like this on the day of a hunt. The only difference is that he wakes up at 2:30 in the morning to go hunting. His stomach is knots because he won't eat before he leaves so he won't have to go to the bathroom. He has done his research on which stand to hunt out of, which takes him as long as it takes for me to pick out my outfit. This whole day is like waiting in the tree stand for a monster buck to shoot. You finally see him and you take the shot. Did you miss it or did you hit the "kill zone?"

With the kids and the hubby finally out of the house, you rush into the bathroom to get ready. It's finally time to leave and of course you're already a few minutes behind schedule. The weight of what is about to take place takes over your every thought.

So here is how my interview today went...

I arrived at the location of my interview without passing out or "tossing my cookies." That was a big accomplishment on my part. If you remember a statement from one of my earlier blogs, my motto is "panic first and think later!" I was thankfully still ten minutes early despite leaving my house later than I wanted to. I was given a sheet of paper that described the job I was applying for. I was reading it over and over again (just in case there was a pop quiz) when I heard my name being called. The lady that was escorting me seemed very friendly. She did not at all fit my image of the grim reaper who should be escorting me into hell!

Now last night I was re-reading for the millionth time, my letter detailing the interview location and time, when two words jumped off of the page and smacked me in the face..."interview committee." Holy crap...there's more than one of them?!?!?! Yep...I walked into a conference room with five people staring at me. I began to sweat "like a whore in church with the preacher talking about fornication!" (thanks for the saying Dana) I had two choices. I could either sit down in the chair that was waiting for me, or I could turn around and run screaming down the hallway like the Cowardly Lion in The Wizard of Oz! I chose to put on my "big girl panties" and deal with it!

I will admit that it was quite intimidating to have all of these people staring at me, but I somehow managed to sit down and brace myself. The first few minutes they described to me what I would be doing on a daily basis in this position. Then they decided to play let's go around the table and ask the pale, sweaty girl a lot of questions. Each one took turns asking me questions and wrote on a sheet of paper what I was saying. I think I did well during the Q&A. Then they dropped the bomb on me.

They were going to do a little role playing with me. I had to answer the phone and talk to someone who was disgruntled and politely let them know that the person they wished to speak with was on another line. I didn't think my face could get any more pale than it already was. I handled the "phone call" as best I could. It was very difficult to know what to say. I am not a person that handles conflict well, so I try to avoid it at all costs. I tried to be as polite as possible while maintaining control of the situation. When the lady that made the call returned to the room, one of the gentlemen stated that I had gotten lucky because she usually cries during role play. OMG...I sure dodged that one! It is quite difficult to handle a conflict when you do not know much about the situation, you aren't that familiar with your job requirements, and oh yeah, you have 4 people staring at you while you do it!

For the last part of the interview, I had to type up a letter and print it out. I almost panicked when she said type because I haven't typed on a regular basis for some time and I knew my speed would not be up to par. I also have fake nails on that make it very difficult to feel the keys. I had heard I might have to be tested on my typing but I didn't think it would be at that very moment. I figured I would have enough time to have the nails removed and practice with the kids Spongebob Squarepants typing software before I would be tested. Luckily, I was informed that I would not be timed. How many bullets must I dodge in one hour? I typed up the letter using an example in the file and then stared at the printer trying to figure out which direction to put the letterhead in. Deep down I knew that secretly they had counted the paper laying on the desk to figure out how many times it would take me to get it right. My angel that is always looking out for me helped me to get it right the first time! I even had the words lined up below the logo. SCORE! I walked the paper up to the receptionist and proudly turned it in. I said thank you and ran out the front door as quickly as possible!

All in all, they were very nice people and we did share a few laughs. They understood about me being nervous and even cracked a few jokes to loosen me up a bit.

So basically...I survived! I did however have to go home and wring out my bra, but I did it. One interview down and no telling how many more to go. I don't know when I will hear from this position, but I am glad to have the interview out of the way. Hopefully someday soon I too will get "THE BIG ONE." (my first kill)

I told you that job searching was a lot like hunting.

I will remember you...

2009-01-14T06:51:00.000-08:00

Today is one of those days where you constantly think about what you were doing this time one year ago. One year ago today, I lost my sister in a car wreck. One year ago today, I had to grow up a little bit more. One year ago today I had to tell the most important people in my life that Missy would not be with us (physically) any more. One year ago today, my best friend, advisor, confidante, wife to Jeff, mother of two, friend to all who knew her, hard worker, live life to the fullest girl left us behind.

A lot has happened since then. We have all grieved, walked down memory lane, smiled, and yes...even laughed! I have learned a lot since then. When things seem to be at their worst, the people who surround you are your true friends. Don't look back at yesterday because it takes away from today. Hug the kids and snuggle with them just a little bit longer. They grow so fast! Make each moment with your spouse count! Be silly sometimes! Laugh until you can't stand it (or wet yourself-and if you've had kids you will)! Do something out of character! Cry when your heart aches from either joy or sadness.

I guess what I am saying is the old cliche of live each day like it was your last. I knew a beautiful lady who did this. She left this world with few regrets. She is also putting a boot in our a#% to make sure we do the same thing!

I plan on living this way. Can you do the same?

I love you Missy!!!

I'll Be Here

I cannot ease your aching heart,
Nor take your pain away;
But let me stay and take your hand
And walk with you today.

I'll listen when you need to talk,
I'll wipe away your tears;
I'll share your worries when they come,
I'll help you face your fears.

I'm here and I will stand by you,
On each hill you have to climb;
So take my hand, let's face the world...
And live just one day at a time.

You're not alone, for I'm still here,
I'll go that extra mile;
And when your grief is easier,
I'll help you learn to smile!

- Author Unknown

Did December really just happen?

2008-12-28T09:38:00.000-08:00

Oh my...where does the time go? I must have blinked because December just came and went in a flash.

Well...to recap my December so far...

I have officially completed my Associates Degree in Accounting. Now I'm sending out resumes left and right. I just want "a foot in the door" kind of job. I feel like I'm not giving this degree enough credit. It is my second associates degree. I've been teasing that if I add the two degrees together then they might equal a bachelor's degree :) ? I'm am just teasing though. Part of me is a little disappointed that I didn't "go for the gold" so to speak, but I am proud of my accomplishment. I worked my hiney off for it! We won't have a graduation ceremony until June or July so that kind of stinks. I am anxious to begin working somewhere soon. I am dreading the whole interview process though. I'm not a people person initially. It takes me a while to feel comfortable around someone new and that shows through when I am interviewing. I had a mock interview for my internship class and that just about drove me to drink! I made it through it with a few laughs along the way. I got the evaluation the other day and I actually did quite well for a nervous Nellie!

With school behind me, I finally got to focus on Christmas. I did the usual basket for the hubby's office which is a two day event in the kitchen for me. I did let Olivia help me out this year. She told one of her friend's mom that she doesn't get to help me bake. Actually I don't bake all that much and I'm usually in a hurry when I do it. This time I decided to slow down and let her help me. She had a blast and she was a natural! Go figure coming from this family! She helped me make chocolate chip cookies (from scratch), muddy buddies, and hot cocoa mix. We had a great time. She has been awfully patient with me this year. She has whined about me always doing homework, but she was so excited the day I told her I was finally done! It was a nice mother/ daughter experience. Everything tasted really good and the office really appreciated everything. I have been doing this for years and I may gripe and complain about doing it but secretly I love every minute of it!!

Fast forward to Christmas Eve...

We did the traditional gathering in Portland for Christmas Eve. We all brought finger foods to munch on as we opened the Mt. Everest pile of presents. We're still looking for Britney. We lost her in the pile! It was a fun yet different gathering. The lack of Missy's presence was definitely felt by all. It had rained and rained and rained all day long (and the day before), but as we loaded up the car to make the drive down to TN it all of a sudden stopped. The sky that was left was like a beautiful painting. The clouds and sun rays were indescribable. I tried to take a picture, but there was no way to capture what my heart was seeing. When we arrived at Jeff's, we were in the kitchen putting the finishing touches on a couple of the dishes and the sunlight in there was absolutely blinding us. I made some crack about how Missy was telling us to get the heck out of her kitchen! Grandaddy did the annual 'Twas the Night Before Christmas reading and then the paper started flying. Everyone had huge smiles on their faces. We cleaned up the mess and left for home because Olivia wasn't feeling well. The was the oddest part. I usually hang around and chat with Missy after everyone leaves. It was the only time when I knew we wouldn't be interrupted by random phone calls from her work. Last year I stayed for two hours or so later than everyone else and we chatted and laughed at the kids playing sing star together. She and I played too. We sang Chasing Cars (one of her favorites at the time). That was the last time I saw her. The year has gone by so very fast. It feels as if God has put it on warp speed just to help us all make it through it.

The kids had a great visit from Santy Claus the next morning. I made a small Christmas dinner for the three of us (Gavin had his usual) and spent the rest of the day opening boxes and loading Ipods. So that's it in a nutshell.

We're still looking for Gavin...we haven't seen hm since Christmas morning. Every once in a while there will be a flash through the kitchen that kind of resembles him, but it quickly disappears down the hallway into his room.

"I'll bet they were thinking...now why don't she write?"

2008-11-29T12:07:00.000-08:00

I'm baaacccckkk!!! Did ya miss me? I sure missed posting. I love that line from Dances with Wolves when Kevin Costner is talking to the skeleton. So much has been going on around here this past few weeks. It has been hard to keep up with everything.

Renee is finally back at home with the hubby and kids. We all miss her terribly. It is so difficult to have to say goodbye to her. I bawled like a baby the whole way home the night before she left. She was bawling too so I'm not the only softy here! I think saying goodbye to her is so difficult because she has stepped into an empty place in my life. She has stepped up into the position of a sister to me. That spot has been a big hole in my life for 10 long months. Saying goodbye to her is almost like saying goodbye to my sister again. There is nothing like the relationship you have with your sister!! There is only one person in the world who can understand what it was like growing up to be who you are. A sister! I have known Renee for ten years, but I didn't really get a chance to get to know her until I visited her in March of this year. She's a beautiful and sweet lady and I have grown to love her and her family dearly. No one can EVER replace Missy as my sister, but it is so great to have a "sis" again. Love ya Nay!!

Another great thing in my life is my girlfriends!! This group of very special friends (including my moms) fill my heart in a way no other people can. I just want you ALL to know how special you are to me. I read this card about girlfriends while I was waiting at Cracker Barrel the other day. I can't remember everything it said but it was so true. I will have to find the quote and share it with you. One of my girlfriends and I were chatting one day back in January after Missy's death. I told her about how weird it feels to lose a sister and how alone and empty it feels sometimes. It felt like I had this huge hole in my heart. She told me that's when I should rely on my girlfriends. She said that my girlfriends were like pebbles trying to fill that boulder sized hole in my heart. She was right! I've realized since then that my girlfriends are not pebbles. They are the most awe inspiring diamonds that have gradually filled my emptiness.

To ALL of my girlfriends...I love you all and I hope you know what extraordinary women you are!!! That is definitely something I am thankful for this year! Hope you all have a beautiful day!

We did it...we did it...we did it...

2008-11-08T11:49:00.000-08:00

Whew!!! I can finally break my silence!

Charlie and I pulled a fast one over on my in laws! We secretly flew their daughter Renee in from Arizona! I have kept quiet about this for two weeks and it is so nice to finally be able to share it with others. It's been a long two weeks and we have been so excited.

She flew in on Wednesday afternoon and I have been hiding her at my house since then. It's been a riot! She is so funny and bubbly. I love it! We have sat outside by the fire and chatted. We have watched movies and laughed until our sides hurt! She and I have ventured out into town during the day carefully avoiding any store that her mom might visit. Our plan was to surprise her mom and dad by meeting them at a restaurant and for Renee to pop out and surprise them. It worked out well because a family friend was visiting and I love to see her whenever she was in town. So it was easy to convince them to come out to eat with us.

We got to Wha Bahs (the restaurant) early and hatched our plan. When Janice called to let us know she was on the way, we had Renee go hide in the bathroom. She and I texted until her mom and dad arrived. They sat down and she snuck up behind them. Neither one of them had any clue that she was going to visit and it's been 2 years since Janice has seen Renee. It was a good surprise. We all had a great time.

Now let the good times roll!!!!!!!!

Birthdays, Fall Festival, and all that jazz...

2008-10-25T12:30:00.000-07:00

Sorry I haven't posted in a while, but as you can see from the title, it has been a little busy around here.

It started last weekend with my birthday. Two of my dearest friends kidnapped me Friday night and took me out on the town. Sarah drove all the way from Louisville to see me. Unfortunately she was ambushed as soon as she stepped out of the car by political discussions. She was a trooper and stood her ground! This is one of the things I love about Sarah. She can be completely ready to kick someone's behind, but she's keeps on smiling! My other kidnapper, Dana, she smiles because she knows what to do with the body when she's done! I have great friends! We wound up going to one of our favorite restaurants for dinner. Afterwards...and this is truly representative of how small our town is...we sat in my car trying to decide what we wanted to do next. We played the merry go round version of "I don't know what to do...what do you want to do?" We finally decided to head to Dana's house where we could hang out without distractions (her distractions were already in bed and asleep). We ran by Wal-mart to pick up provisions of chocolate and more chocolate. We proceeded to spend the next 4 or 5 hours getting hooked on a new HBO show that Dana watches. Sarah and I are still cursing her for that one! I had a blast. I could think of nothing else I would rather do for my birthday than hang out with my friends and wait for the sugar high to go away. Love...love...love...the white chocolate!

As if that wasn't enough birthday excitement for one weekend, the next evening (my actual birthday) was our first neighborhood block party. It was a lot of fun! We ate like pigs and got to know our neighbors. The kids had a blast running all over the place playing. It was very chilly, but luckily my hubby had bought a fire pit for my birthday. We broke that bad boy out, lit a couple of logs, and we were warm in no time. I love fall! One of my friends in the subdivision brought me a birthday cake that she had made. It was so sweet because she has only made 2 or 3 cakes in her life (most of them were made this year). It was very good too.

Last night was the Fall Festival for Gavin and Olivia's school. They had a blast! I was quite positive that Olivia would not fall asleep for a year after all of the "baby crack" (sugar) she ingested! She did however crash and burn around 11pm. Gavin had his face painted really cool. I took a picture and maybe I can post it soon.

I'm not so fond of Fall Festival. It is so loud and crowded and there are kids running around everywhere you look. Some of the kids are older (like 5th or 6th grade or junior high) and I think their parents just drop them off hoping they will behave. I did live to tell the tale. I'm not sure why I get so overwhelmed when we attend? I'm sure it's some lovely trait I inherited from my parents. I can most likely point my finger at my father. THANKS DAD! :) Neither one of us is fond of crowds. Oh well...like I said...I survived. I quickly retreated home to sit outside and enjoy my fire pit with the hubby and a neighbor.

I told you I've been busy!

Peace and Quiet (or something like that)...

2008-10-13T06:58:00.000-07:00

I'm doing my happy dance this morning!!! The kids are back in school!!

Fall break came and went and things are back to normal (or at least what is considered normal around our house). There is the beautiful sound of nothing in my house now. There is no Hannah Montana or Spongebob Squarepants on the tv. No one is yelling about so and so breathing on them. Ah...life is beautiful!

You see around my house, silence is a rare thing. My husband is in sales. He talks for a living! Olivia is the spitting image of him in EVERY way! I sometimes think that she believes that if she is silent for more than 30 seconds that the world will cease to exist. The Earth will stop spinning, the sun will become cold, and the stars will fall from the skies. She talks ALL the time! She's like the picture of that cat that has been going around in emails. It's a picture of this HUGE cat sitting and the caption reads "he knew holding his farts in would come back and bite him in the end." That is Olivia. She's not holding in farts, but if she stops talking she thinks she will explode!

Gavin, on the other hand, is so quiet you honestly forget he is in the house! He's very much into doing his own thing. He spent last week in his bedroom playing video games. He would occasionally leave the room (in his Hugh Heffner robe and boxers) and grab a glass of milk or a bag of doritoes. He really does look like Hugh Heffner when he's in his robe. It is his routine every day to come home from school and instantly put on his boxer shorts and his red plush robe. His dad loves to pick on him. He'll say "how's it going Hef?" Gavin will just growl the word daddy, slap himself on the head and walk back towards his room shaking his head.

We didn't really have too much excitement last week. We made numerous trips to McDonalds, had lunch with friends, spent time at Aunt Dana's, colored Aunt Dana's hair, got haircuts for the kiddos, and had a few sleepovers. Joey and I got to enjoy a night on the town with a couple of our friends. It was a lot of fun! It really wasn't a bad week. I'm looking forward to heading back to my internship tomorrow!

Hope you all have a great day!!

Someone up there is laughing at me right about now...

2008-10-01T17:20:00.000-07:00

My day started off well. I was enjoying my second day of my internship. My supervisor was showing me how she does her posting to her ledgers at the end of the month and makes sure that everything balances, when my cell phone rang. It was the kids' school calling to inform me that there were several cases of head lice going around in the second grade and that Olivia had a few nits in her hair. After saying a few choice words in my head, I said I would pick her up as soon as I picked up some "supplies." Instant panic set in because I had never dealt with head lice before. I know it's not an embarrassment like it used to be. I know my kids and my house are kept clean. I also know my fair share of mothers who have dealt with it.

I leave work and head straight to CVS to pick up the treatment kit and bleach. I get to the school and the secretaries smile knowingly. They tell me that it's no big deal and they have dealt with it themselves. Meanwhile my overactive brain is FREAKING out! What the heck do I do? I called a friend to make sure I had everything I would need and she tells me what to do. We get home and I strip Olivia's bed of everything and throw it all into the washer. I gather up anything that resembles something that would come into contact with her head or anyone else's and throw it into the trash. My faithful soldier of a hubby comes home because I am in a total panic trying to get everything done. He asks what he needs to do and I tell him to spray all of her toys and put them into a garbage bags and put them into the garage.

I wash Olivia's hair and apply the treatment. After the treatment is done, I comb through her hair with the special nit comb. As this is going on, I am in a conversation with my friend again asking her what the heck am I looking for? I keep inspecting the comb but I don't see anything. I had read that these "cooties" as she called them would be about the size of a sesame seed. She said that they were smaller than that. I'm still wondering what the heck am I looking for? She can tell I am majorly stressing and says she'll call me later. I then called one of my neighbors who is a registered nurse. She had me bring Olivia to her house so she could look at her head. Of course while all of this is going on I keep feeling this itch on my head (which freaks me out even more). My neighbor carefully checked Olivia's head and proceeded to tell me that she didn't see anything at all. She also said that it didn't look like she had ever had any signs of lice. At this point, the whole world freezes for a few minutes as I soak this all in. I am picturing my house which is thouroughly torn up by now, thinking "you have got to be kidding me!" Just to be safe she checked my head and gave me the all clear.

Now for those of you that don't know me all that well, my motto is panic first think later!! Any who...crisis resolved. She is free and clear (for now) and I now know how to handle the "cooties" if they happen again. Hope you all had a better day than me! I'm off to fight my way into the laundry room so I can see the floor.

Whoa Momma!!!

2008-09-25T15:55:00.000-07:00

OK...picture this.

Young girl walks into a tattoo parlor and asks "Is my mom here?"

While this may not seem weird to some people, it sure as heck felt strange for me. That's right everyone. My mom got her first tattoo yesterday. I'm so very proud of her. My dad got his a few months ago and it was awesome too. There's a story behind the sudden urge to get tattoos, but that story is best told by my mom on her blog. I just wanted to take a moment and give her a big thumbs up and say way to go Squirrelly!!

Meanwhile back at the ranch...

Today was a ramblin kind of day. I have been off from school for a two week break and so far it hasn't been much of a break. It's been one thing after another. So much for my grand plans to read a book (that I picked and for sheer pleasure), organize the house, get caught up on paperwork, and take a nap. I did manage to get "caught up" on my household paperwork only to realize that you never really quite catch up on paperwork. There's always a pile of it that sneaks up on you just when you think you are finished. It's like a couple of rabbits. You walk out of the room for one second and when you come back it has procreated all over your office!!!

I did manage to go through my office closet and my son's room on my hiatus. I begin classes again on Monday which also is the start of my internship. I'm not sure how much else I can get done before then. Oh well...c'est la vie!! For those of you that don't know me very well, I am an organizing freak!! Disorder and chaos cause me anxiety. Trust me...I will get this done even though I would love nothing more than to simply sit back and relax. I listen to what the voices tell me to do :) Thanks mom. Thanks dad. You did this to me didn't you :)

I'm not all about boring! I did have some fun this past weekend in Louisville. I had the pleasure of visiting one of my very best friends and confidants as well as her husband (whom I adore). Trust me ladies...everyone needs an Aaron!! I had a blast. It was one of those rare opportunities when I got to take off sans kids and enjoy a little spontaneity. Sarah and Aaron laughed at me quite a few times because I didn't know what I wanted to do while I was there. I couldn't imagine someone actually asking me what I wanted to do and I wasn't limited by children. You don't give a mom that kind of freedom!! It will make her head explode because she's not used to having so many options. What do people do in their "free" time?

We went out and ate at a great cafe (get this...) at 9:30 at night. How freakin cool is that? Then I got to witness a girl fight in the parking lot across the street from the restaurant. The cops showed up and everything. Needless to say, my senses were overwhelmed and we made our way back to their apartment. Sarah and I went out the next afternoon while Aaron was working and enjoyed a stroll down Bardstown Road. Once again the looming question of what do we want to do came up. We wound up hitting the local Barnes and Noble (a favorite past time for myself and Sarah). We looked around for a while, got some Starbucks (loved the spinach and feta stuffed pretzel), and went back to the apartment. We were going to venture out to Bardstown Road again but our sleepiness got the best of us. We watched a cute movie called Son of Rambow and said our goodnites. I had so much fun that I didn't want to leave the next day but I knew I had to go. So, thanks Sarah and Aaron for reminding this mommy what it's like to have a little freedom every once in a while. I deeply love my children but every mom needs to get away now and then!!

Now that I have rambled on profusely...I need to get back to the real world and wait for ER's season premiere tonite. Missy loved this show so it's kind of bittersweet to watch because it is the final season. Hope you have a great night!

Home sweet home...

2008-09-17T17:50:00.000-07:00

I am experiencing something very new in my life.

We moved into a subdivision in October of last year to my great delight. I am not a country girl by any means! We have lived in the boonies most of our married life. I have ran off escaped cows, listened to coyotes fight outside my bedroom window, had the tee total snot scared out of me by various glowing eyes in the dark, dodged diving bats, and watched big snakes eat live frogs out on my patio. I am not built for that kind of life! I do not like it Sam I Am!

I can honestly say moving was one of the best decisions we have made. We live in a peaceful subdivision, but it is still in a very rural area. It is honestly the best of both worlds. Charlie gets to go hunting about 2 minutes away and I have neighbors (beautiful glorious neighbors). Every person I have met is super friendly. Charlie has even found a few buddies in the neighborhood. He and the boys get together just about every weekend at our house to drink a few and play. They break out the corn hole and play a few games while talking smack to each other. I get the biggest giggles out of watching them strut across the yard and dole out high fives! After they have finished playing, they retire to the deck and out pop the guitars and mandolins. It is a beautiful sound listening to Charlie and his buddy Gill play together(unless it goes on until 4 am and I worry about them waking up the neighbors). I usually go to bed before they are done but I can hear them outside the window telling jokes and singing songs that Charlie has written.

Best of all...the kids have other kids to play with. They can safely ride up and down our street and I don't have to worry. We can go out for walks and go fishing in the pond. It was quite funny yesterday because I was watching two of my neighbors kids and they were outside with my two kids. The next thing I know there are nine kids riding their bikes up and down the street laughing and having a great time. It was so cool to watch. They were just riding back and forth singing Soldier Boy and enjoying being outside.

This is exactly what Charlie and I were hoping for when we moved here. We have truly been blessed with so many new friends. I believe God truly wanted us here (there's a story there). We prayed and prayed about it and believe this is exactly where he wants us. These are the people who have welcomed us with open arms and made us feel at home. When Missy died in January, we had only been living here for 2 months, but everyone was so kind and asked if there was anything they could do. Imagine that...two months and we were swarmed with offers of food and babysitting. Where else can you find that?

I look forward to the third Thursday of the month because the ladies of the neighborhood get together and play bingo. One of the ladies, Linda, invites us into her home and makes a great dinner and we play and chat and laugh. We are also trying to get a block party together for October and we are trying to put together some boxes of goodies to send to Linda's son's battalion in Iraq for Christmas. This is the kind of neighborhood I have dreamed about. I feel so blessed to have this opportunity in our lives to connect with some truly extraordinary people.

so here it goes...

2008-09-14T13:30:00.000-07:00

My mom has often suggested that I needed to start blogging. I have a husband of 10 years, two kids ( a boy and a girl), and 3 crazy cats. What more do I need you say? AN OUTLET!! Somewhere that I can divulge the insanity that is my everyday life.

Why the title of "What Was I Thinking?" My life is filled with moments where I say to myself, "Karri, what were you thinking?" As a matter of fact, I say it everyday...all day long!! You see...I was "blessed" with naturally blonde hair. Do I need to go on? :) After 30 years of showing it, I finally dyed it red. Ha Ha I know...you can run but you can't hide!!

Anywho...enough blonde jokes. The other possible title was "Out of My Flippin Mind." I think that one a lot and I say it even more. I love the blank stare my kids give me when I use that one. I get a little giggle imagining the mental picture that floats thru their heads.

So, I asked my husband for his opinion on which title to use. He gives me the standard "I don't know honey. They both sound good." The funny thing is that I knew he would say that. So after I mentally knock him upside the head, I walk out of the room and mumble to myself, "What was I thinking?".

And thus a blog is born!